on new years before the ball dropped i fucked a bro. then after the ball dropped, i had a moment and realized i hadn’t had sex all year. so later that day i went to a different bros house, fucked him too. then that monday, i gave the third guy a BROjob in the school parking lot. then the day after that we had some of the greatest sex of my life. i made him two sandwiches. MLIH.

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